Another Blog? Uhm...Yes!

Well, this blog will be dedicated to my relationship with God.   I really wanted a place that I can bring my thoughts to and a place where I can vent.  I really love God and I'm learning everyday to trush Him and rely on him for everything!  But this is no easy task.  Like all other relationships in my life we go through tough times, but its never because of God its either me wanting something and pouting because I cant get it or struggling through my struggles. Sometimes I am very angry with God for not giving me the one thing that I desire the most and that is to be loved.  I can honestly say that my biggest struggle however has been dealing with this thing called lonliness!  I am very fustrated with the matter.

I have often gone to God and asked him why am I alone?  There are soooooo many things that I have gone to God with crying and just worrying about, last minute bills, baby daddies, my kids, my family, cars, apartment situations, jobs, school, you name it and I have gone to God about it, and you know what?  He has taken care of those things for me.  But when it comes to this thing called LOVE.  I dont know what to say or where to begin.  Yes, Ive made plenty of mistakes.  I've fell in love with Mr Wrong, Mr. Wrong Time, Mr. Wanna Make Him Mr. Right, and Mr. Looks like Mr. Right...you name him and I have probably met him.  But like everything else in my life when I realize that I can't do anything to change the situation or rather, when I realize I am not the best "man" for the job I look to God.  So after 29 years of horrific dating I am finally ready to ask God to help me with this.

I have made a vow to not have sex with another man until I am married.  I have become "very" selective in my dating.  I dont give out my number these days.  I dont get on these dating sites anymore.  I really want to work on my relationship with God and my relationships with my kids but, I DONT WANT TO BE ALONE FOREVER!!!!!

So, now what?  Please dont look to this blog for answers because I do not have them.  But what I learn and experience I will share. 

This is something that I feel that God has led me to do so here I AM!